oh, man ~ omen ~ amen

it was the owl in the tree this morning that told me my prayers would be answered. it was the number “123” that seemed to show up on every clock, mailbox, calendar, and meme that my eyes ventured toward. it was the simple belief that the deer in the road was there to warn me to slow down. i don’t care if i’m right about whether or not that beetle is there for me, or if it is just there. Does it matter? Does the meaning i find in small encounters throughout the day challenge your understanding of how the world works? no? then why does it make you so upset - when i talk about the crow in the yard that is obviously there to remind me to bring magic back into my life? why do you raise your voice when i see a snake in the garden and yell “a sign of transformation!”

is your concept of reality that easily shaken - that you cannot let my own be different from yours? and while you roll your eyes at my search for synchronicities, what you don’t understand is that i have asked for signs to tell me whether or not i should leave you. i have put faith in something beyond myself to make a decision on how this relationship will unfold. yes, that is my little secret. the irony, however, is that i already know the answer. and the omens, the signs, the universal hints - i will shape them to signal whatever it is my soul already knows. like hands on the ouija board - the message comes from within, the meaning from my own psyche.